Gnoman Invasion

Britain, as you know, is a place very keen on tradition. Some say this is because Britain is an island nation that has not been successfully invaded since 1066. Perhaps that is true.

Curious traditions at Oxford include: speaking grace in latin before formal hall dinners, wearing student gowns during exams, responding to dinner invitations by "pigeon post", pronouncing "Magdalen" as "Maud-lin", "Hertford" as "Hart-fd", and "Worcester" as "Wuss-ter", eating peas and parsnips (yuck!) with your warm beer (yuck!), taking baths instead of showers, and driving on the wrong side of the road. Who would've thunk it? The English take great pride in all things ancient. Everywhere you look there seems to be a competition to claim that something is the oldest of its kind in England, Europe, the world. The pubs, churches, coffee houses and colleges attempt to outdo each other with claims such as "oldest archway in Oxford", "only remaining 16th century pub stools", and the like. Balliol, Merton and University Colleges each claim to be the oldest Oxford college, and each has a valid claim to that title. I wouldn't be surprised if I encountered a pub that brags about having the "oldest, foulest shepherd's pie in England, served by the oldest, raunchiest crones in Christendom."

Speaking of traditions, this Saturday night / early Sunday morning, Merton college celebrates the changing of the clocks with the "Time Ceremony". I'm told that this involves the students gathering on the Merton lawns at 1:00am, dressed in full sub-fusc clothing (see below), where we walk backwards and drink port to the chiming of the chapel bells. I may be at home sleeping...

About a week and a half ago, I became a full member of Oxford university by way of the matriculation ceremony. This involves all the freshers (new undergraduates and graduates) of each college gathering in their respective colleges at an unholy hour of the morning, dressed in sub-fusc: black suits, black shoes, white shirts, white bow ties (for men), academic gowns and goofy hats. ("The boy's a time-bomb!") There we took a group photograph, looking like some ivory tower army. Here's a quaint photo of a bunch of us heading out of the college after the formal photos were done.



You'll recognize me on the left (in human rather than gnomish form). That's Jamie on the right, a fellow law student. You can't see Premala, the other Merton BCL student, since she's ahead of us. You also can't see the lovely Lindsay Loo, because she's taking the pictures!

After the photo business, we all strolled up to the High Street and entered the Examination Schools. There we heard some more latin mumbo-jumbo and were pronounced members of Oxford University "for all time". That's like... cool. Here is a shot of me leaving the Examination Schools amid the crowds, beaming like a schoolboy.



You will note that as my skin gets paler and my hair gets longer, I am taking on an uncanny resemblance to Professor Snape! My Hallowe'en costume for this year will be easy.

The highlight of the morning was the "fry-up" that several of us enjoyed at the Queen's Lane Coffee House after the ceremonies were said and done. Mmmm... bacon... mmm... cheese... mmm... cardiac arrest.